I think sometimes a mother just has to take a minute. When the kids were younger, my minute was needed after the boys had sharpied the brand new couch then each other in the span of the 45 seconds it took me to change a load of laundry. I needed it again when we were in Guam and Kamdyn had pinched three different kids at play group, leaving a good mark on one of them and an impression on every mom. {I told you she was a tough little girl!}
Those days wore this mama down, and a wise person told me that those days might keep me on my feet but the teenage years would keep me on my knees. This week, that saying came back to me as I realized yet again and over and over that I needed a minute.
It wasn't so much about something the kids did in their behavior. It was more because reality knocked me off my balance as I saw each of them achieving milestones and living life. And while my heart was full of joy, I think a piece of me also longed for those preK stay at home days that are now a distant memory.
After celebrating Kamdyn's 15th birthday, I took her to get her permit mostly because she hounded Brian and I in a way that the boys never did! And after an hour and 20 minutes of chaos with the people at the DMV {seriously, it.wore.me.out!} this is what we came out with...
...and if you think she wasn't proud then clearly you aren't seeing the smile that is covering her face! And, I needed just a minute. This is our baby, the last one going through this whole "mom, what is the shoulder of the road?" and "how far back do you honk your horn?" routine of questioning that comes when studying for the permit test. I mean, there are questions on that test that I can not answer and I am a grown person, a driver for 20+ years! Yet, here we were taking a picture I have taken two other times, celebrating an achievement in her life that puts her one step closer to adulthood and puts me on my knees, praying for her safety and discernment as she wants to get behind the wheel.
Earlier this week Brendan got a large envelope in the mail from Alabama and several smaller ones. I knew when I sorted the mail and saw the envelope that I would need a minute. I called him into the kitchen and handed over the envelopes. In three seconds he had the big one open and here is what he brought me...
...a certificate of Admission to Alabama. He also had a letter of acceptance to the College of Engineering and information about housing and blah blah blah. Honestly, it got kind of blurry as my eyes filled with tears. This is what he has been working for, checking off his goals as he has done so many other times in his life and I needed a minute. I'm praying doors open for his ROTC scholarship and that he finds a good roommate and that there will be a church that he plugs into and that he eats at least two meals a day and on and on. The Lord probably thinks I am the only one to ever face sending their first born off the college what with all the time I am spending in prayer but I know it's best to just give it to God because there really won't be anything I can do once the time comes.
This week Brendan also led the National Honor Society induction ceremony because he is the president this year. And so there he stood, all dressed up and official and grown....
...and yep, I needed a minute. As a kid he used to wear Brian's hat or boots and on this day he wore his tie and shirt. And here we are in the blink of an eye, the Lord answering my prayers for a son who would be a leader with strong opinions and an independent mind.
In Koby's life, he has been the provider of quite a few minutes for me! With is live-big-or-go-home personality I never know what is just around the corner for him. This week, he did not disappoint! I snapped this picture at the pep rally....
...as he led the junior class and football boys in the chant for the spirit stick. That's him, big #25 laid back, cheering loud, always with a group of friends. He sees no color barrier, meets no stranger, wants everyone to get along and have fun and laugh. And then as I looked through my picture download this morning I also saw this picture....
...and there he is again! Big #25, setting up the play and rallying the team and I needed a minute. This child has no fear, gives you all his heart and is loyal to the end. And so he lined up again and again as his team took one big hit after another...
...and then made one big catch, being the spark the team needed for the only score of the night. This child who keeps that twinkle in his eye, who faces giants like he is one himself.
So this post is not so much about informing you or entertaining you, although even at best I don't know that I do that really. This morning this was just therapy for my heart and maybe one day, if the internet is still even relevant, my kids will stumble across this and know their mama loved them. Their parents were proud of the work God completed in them. And in the times when they might need a minute themselves, maybe they'll know they are not alone. It happens to us all!
I don't know what might be causing you to need a minute today, but God alone is your strength, provider and sustainer in the good times and in the bad. And, if you are on the other end of the parenting spectrum, enjoy the time at home - even the sharpied couch, crushed up goldfish, spilled koolaid on a cleanly mopped floor, fit throwing, child pinching days and know one day there may be quiet but peace will only come from time spent on your knees.
